Mission Statement

Hmm, it looks like the Dilbert Mission Statement Generator could save some teams/groups/committees many hours of meetings.



Example of Generated Statement (Works for me): Our challenge is to seamlessly promote business infrastructures to meet our customer's needs.

Employees

I have had a position open for some time.  Two other positions were recently vacated.  So I sit with 3 positions open.  The interview process has been completed and a candidate recommended for the first one, but I have not received approval to offer it to the individual yet.  I am also awaiting approval to post the other two.  One of the problems has been that the position titles for the first one were juggled, so I ended up with a lesser title to fill than what left.  There ended up being some dispute on the title swap, then a new rule was put in place that requires an additional level of approval for positions at a certain salary level.  Now it has been so long that the small paragraph justifying filling the position is not good enough.  There is a new form that has to be filled out which includes the justification for filling the position and the ramifications for not filling it.  My new boss is suppose to pass that form on to me to get filled out, so that we can get it submitted and hopefully get the position filled soon.

And today another turn in the whole employee environment.  This afternoon my boss came to me about possibly having another two employees transferred under me.  It sounds like a determination as to whether or not that will actually happen may take place tomorrow, but once again, things don't always happen so quickly and they tend to change as well.

 

As it has as many turns and twists as a Soap Opera I though of a list I recently saw called, "You Work For The Government If" and have listed the ones that I can relate to, at least to some degree:

• You understand the rationalization of an acronym comprised of acronyms.
• You can name the project leader of more than 10 projects including your own, but still can't explain in the simplest terms what they do.
• You work for an acronym, on an acronym, and your job title is an acronym.
• You've sat at the same desk for 3 years, done the same thing for 3 years, but have had 3 different business cards.  (Actually they wanted to save money and kept from reprinting business cards until re-organizations were complete -  after a least 3 re-orgs of some degree they are talking about new business cards - I think the only thing correct on the cards I have are my name and phone number.  Agency, address, e-mail address (which may possibly change again), etc.. have all changed.)
• The process becomes more important than the product.
• You don't see anything wrong with attending a meeting on a subject you know nothing about.
• You realize that a paperless office is impossible. Actually, you believe it is possible, just not in your office.
• You keep documents/manuals on projects that have been long since canceled.
• You stop raising issues/problems because you know you will be the one answering them.
• You've sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different agencies.
• Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.  (Not that I am submitting it to anyone right now, but it is on a USB drive, not a diskette) 
• The office symbol on your badge is applied with tape. (no, but the symbol looks like Tinker Toys)
• You get really excited about a 2% pay raise.
• Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.  (Not that he might not be able to, but being new he wouldn't be able to. - I must admit that all of my employees could say this one pertains to them, as I could not do what they do.)
• You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.  (Been there, done that -  Okay my bedroom closet isn't all that big, but I have seen closets as big as the cubicles most employees are in.  I am actually fortunate enough to have a nice sized office- although I can say I have seen home bathrooms larger than my office - As I understand it, per our latest reorganization though, I am not entitled to an office and would be back in a cubicle along with all of the other supervisors and possibly managers, except that they are not going to tear up the existing offices to simply put in cubes, at least at this point.)
• It's dark when you drive to and from work.
• Fun is when issues are assigned to someone else.
• Communication is something your group is having problems with.
• Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're in the hospital.  (I have seen this definition used as I have seen people called into work after having called in sick.)
• You're already late on the assignment you just got.
• Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube. (or are in every e-mail inbox - of course you can't get to the site from work as the SmartFilter will block your access.)
• Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers."  (I have often heard that over the years from my wife's family members.)
• Change is the norm.
• You can name more people that used to work with you than people who do.  (Not going to take the time to list them all to check it out, but it is probably not to far from the truth.)

Oops

A secretary called me to let me know that she had a check for one of my former employees.  They were suppose to get their last paycheck via direct deposit, so I figured Personnel must have messed up.  I kind of thought that since the 15th they would have realized that it was not direct deposited.  If you have some bills automatically deducted from your bank account and you thought the money was going to be there, it could cause some problems for someone.  I called the former employee and let them know I had a check for them and as we are talking and I look the check was dated for tomorrow.  Oops.  Personnel did mess up.  The paperwork had gone over and a copy had been returned, but someone forgot to disable them in the system, thus they accrued a paycheck without being at work.  If I could just figure out how to do that.

Dilbert

Someone pointed out a Dilbert comic strip to me today that was rather humorous as many of them are. Although as funny as it may be, it is also somewhat sad how closely it resembles reality. I know that Scott has to be working where I do or has someone there feeding him content.

Change Management

We are implementing a Change Management Process at work. I understand how it got its name now. Even though it has been implemented, everytime there is a meeting or mention of the process, management decides to make a change to it.

Gmail not loading - problem logging in - pages reloads repeatedly

 Are you having problems with your Gmail just sitting there reloading over and over and over, never letting you get logged in after you have put in your userid and password and to top it off you can get into other Google items just fine (calendar, blogger, etc...)?  If you are you might want to take a look at the link below.  It is likely your firewall software causing you problems.

Quote

Gmail: Help Center - Troubleshooter: Loading Issues

Warm Weather

Considering that it is 10:30pm and still 65 degrees, you could say it has been unseasonably warm today.



The average high for November is around 55. Tomorrow we are suppose to have a high around 78.

Microsoft Office Live Launches Nov 15th

Note from Microsoft:

The new release of Microsoft® Office Live is just a week away

We want to remind you that the Microsoft Office Live Beta program is ending and that we will begin updating your account to take advantage of our new Microsoft Office Live services in approximately one week. Carefully read the information below to help ensure a smooth transition to the new Microsoft Office Live. As a common practice, we encourage you to back up your important files and documents regularly.

Office Live Offerings

Election Results in Missouri

Interested in Election results in Missouri?  Click here.

Mail.com

When logging into a Mail.com e-mail account you can select to use Mail.com Beta. All of the advertising associated with the free acounts is about enough to make you think about a paid account, if it weren't for the fact that there are so many other free e-mail account offers around that are not as obnoxious regarding advertising, but one of the interesting features of the Beta is you can have it read e-mail messages to you. You can also download an audio version of an e-mail in MP3 format.

Happy Carz

Looking at the prices I think the ones running Happy Days Dream Cars might be a bit happier than the cars.

They do have some cool cars though.

The end is near for BloggerBot

BloggerBot is going away.